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The Untouchables
Words are very powerful, they can hurt, heal, illuminate or conceal, the words we choose can completely change the way we see things. The words used in charging those responsible for killing baby Peter, give little clue to the violent sadistic nature of his murder, the charge was 'causing the death of or allowing the death of..…'
In the United Kingdom, there are over sixty thousand children and young people in public care, the words we use to describe these are 'looked after' children. Given the risk-adverse, 'hands off' approach which currently blights childcare, the choice of these words correctly reflects the present politics of childcare with the implication that these children and young people are passive recipients of some corporate, looking after behaviour.
Being 'looked after' usually means that children are either 'cared for' by 'foster carers' or 'care staff'. Perhaps, out of a mistaken desire to respect the biological relationship between parents and children, we no longer have 'foster parents' or 'house parents'. However, replacing the word 'parent' with 'carer' is a disservice to the children: the word 'care' could just as easily describe the behaviour we display when we wash and service a car or feed a goldfish. Every child needs more than just being 'cared for' each child is worthy of, and deserves to be, 'cared about' and is entitled to be 'parented'.
It seems that 'society' will go to extraordinary lengths to avoid the simple reality that children in public care, like all children, need parenting. Adding the word 'good' to parenting, qualifies the need and calls for further explanation. Parenting describes the commitment and responsibility, which is carried out through complex behaviours and skills used to provide for the child's particular needs, to guide, be concerned for, think about, and plan for a growing child. Although the child's biological parents usually carry out the 'parenting' tasks, for children in public care, this is delegated to professionals. In short, we pay people to carry out the 'parenting' tasks on behalf of society.
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